If you want a healthy loving relationship, one of the core foundation pieces has to be healthy boundaries. When these are missing, it doesn’t take long for a healthy relationship to morph into a hate relationship!
Why? When one partner allows their boundaries to be abused or violated, several things happen. They eventually begin to feel manipulated, taken advantage of, and not respected. Soon, they feel weakened and depressed for no reason. You can see what follows next!
How can you strengthen your boundaries? Here are several tools:
First – get to know yourself better and define what you will allow in any relationship (as well as what you won’t!)
Second – Communicate clearly what you find to every person in your life
Third – State your needs quickly – as soon as you feel any encroachment, stand up for your truth
Finally – Be aware – when you have weak boundaries, master manipulators will be attracted to you.
You can’t be a compassionate friend (or lover) until you first have strong boundaries. Otherwise every relationship will move into co-dependency, and you will find yourself being empathetic rather than compassionate. This is when you get sucked dry.
